Sleepwalking

My head hurts. My car smells like ass
Open my eyes with my head on the dash.
Did I really just wake up in my front seat?
Why am I parked in the middle of the street?
Look on the floor, an empty bottle of gin
A pounding in my head-It happened again.
Last night I went to bed, calm and quiet
But once I was asleep I started a riot

You see mom I'm really an innocent guy
But for some reason, I don't know really why
I go to bed and sleepwalk each night
Hit up the bar and start crazy fights
When I go to sleep somehow I'm just dumber
Just reached in my pocket and found a girl's number
I don't think I'll call her, I doubt she was hot.
When I'm asleep I pick bad ones a lot

Maybe I should become a lucid dreamer
Cause right now I'm just an unconscious schemer
My friends don't like me when I'm awake
I try to tell them "The asleep me is fake!"
But the asleep me is real, at least that's what they say
I wonder what would happen if I slept in the day
But I guess for now, I'll just sleepwalk at night
And if I wake up hungover, well I guess that's alright.